Top Ten Hopeful - 2011

Jason and/or Melia's first entry:


"Dance for me, puppet!"

Jason landed the perfect job.  He gets to stand behind a register and cheerfully greet all the happy people that come into the frozen yogurt shop.  They get their own yogurt cup, they fill that cup with the frozen confection of their choice and then complete their creation with any number of tasty toppings.  Then they walk over to where Jason is standing and they place their dessert on a scale and he tells them how much to pay him for it.  Tough job.

What cracks us up, though, is that he has a tip jar placed right by the scale.  What on earth does he do to deserve a tip?  Sure, he's cute and friendly... but has it really come to the point where we have to tip people for being friendly?  Shouldn't that be the reason they were hired in the first place?  This is frozen yogurt, not the DMV.  Cheerful service is expected here.

But, hey... if people are willing, why not?  Right?

We decided to make a family trip to the Yogurt Story and check it out.  After we all got our dessert and sat down, I gave Melia (7 years old) a quarter to give to Jason as a tip.  She walked over to the tip jar and looked him dead in the eye with an expression of such seriousness on her face, it commanded his attention.  Without blinking, she held up the quarter and said, "Dance."  He stared her down for a second or two.  Then, to Melia's great pleasure, he started to dance to the music playing in the background.  He got a couple of strange looks from the other customers, but he aimed to please.  Melia smiled, nodded her head and dropped the quarter into the jar.

He earned it.

The Big Happy!

You know that song, "Choose the Right Way and Be Happy"?  I was a firm believer of it.  I truly believed that if I was a good girl and did the best I could, I'd be rewarded with happiness.

You can imagine my shock when I didn't get to be cheerleader in 8th grade.  And, hey!  I was nice!  Why were those popular kids so mean to me?  And when I was in college, I studied like crazy but still couldn't get anywhere NEAR an "A" in Music History.  And... wait a minute!  I did my visiting teaching without fail, brought in dinners for sick people and held family home evening dutifully every Monday... so why is my metabolism slowing down?  How is THAT fair?!

There are plenty of situations in life that do not reward a good decision with instant joy.  As a matter of fact, there are many times in life when it seems that the right choice, the righteous choice, will prevent you from some pleasure or some ease.  So, is it all a lie?  Is it true that we can either laugh with the sinners or cry with the Saints?

I've come to understand that an instant reward of pleasure is not the same thing as eternal joy.  Neither is trial or hardship the same as everlasting misery.  Our loving Father in Heaven has born testimony of the true nature of joy in nearly everything around us.  Muscles need to be broken down before they can become strong.  Gold needs to be refined by fire before it becomes pure.  A rose bush needs to be pruned back before it will produce beautiful, strong branches for the roses to bloom upon.  Winter precedes the Spring; night comes before dawn; rain needs to fall if life is to flourish... it's all there.

I taught this lesson to the little ones in Primary a few years ago.  I call it "The Big Happy".  God loves us enough to allow us to go through discomfort and temporary pain, if it means that we will ultimately learn the lessons that will bring us back to Him forever.  On the other hand, Lucifer hates us so much that he's more than happy to offer us pleasure and ease for this short earth life if it means that we will, in the end, be miserable for eternity.  Talk about a "Big Sad".

So, through life we will, of a necessity, experience sorrow, pain and heartache.  In the grand scheme of things, these are "little" moments of sorrow... they have purpose... they are NOT eternal.  There will also be moments of temporary pleasure:  chocolate, a good movie, the rare opportunity to sleep in, an entertaining blog post.  These are not evil.  Pleasure is not wrong.  We just need to make sure that we keep these things in their proper place.  They are not the ultimate goal.  I've known many people who have made the terrible mistake of leaving their families in search of that perfect situation and constant feeling of happiness.  That's not how it works.  The things of this world can never satisfy our spiritual longing to be filled with the light we once knew when we were in our Father's presence.  Believe me, I've tried.  I've eaten an entire pan of brownies under this misguided attempt to find happiness.  The first brownie brought me so much pleasure, that surely several more delicious squares of eternal chocolate joy would bring even more.  (Heavy sigh... no pun intended.)  It just doesn't work that way. 

So what about the whole "Men are that they might have joy" thing?  If you read that whole chapter (2 Nephi 2), you'll see that the prophet Lehi is trying to explain the principle of the Big Happy to his children.  He talks about how there must be opposition in all things and then he follows it up with the statement that we are free to choose for ourselves.  We are free to choose liberty and eternal life, or captivity and death.  Hmmm.  Which to choose... which to choose.  Well, who on earth would choose captivity and death, for crying out loud?!  Sadly, we all linger a little too long at the captivity-and-death booth.  Lucifer just knows how to deck out his display.  He hands out sensual and alluring "freebies" to try to hook us and then reel us in to a life of pleasure-seeking selfishness.  This is what the Lord meant when he warned us about being focused on the pleasures of this world: 

"O, my beloved brethren, remember the awfulness in transgressing against that Holy God, and also the awfulness of yielding to the enticings of that cunning one. Remember, to be carnally-minded is death, and to be spiritually-minded is life eternal."  (2Nephi 9:39)

So, yes, there will be some crummy days, months... even years ahead.  But the promise of joy to those who choose the right is no lie.  The real lie is found in that saying that I mentioned earlier about laughing with the sinners or crying with the saints.  The truth is, everyone has moments of sorrow... even the sinners.  The difference is that the saints know where to turn for comfort and peace.  Those who follow Lucifer, whether intentionally or not, will find that he "cheateth their souls and leadeth them away carefully down to hell."  (2Nephi 28:21)  He's not much on comfort, needless to say.

I'll just sum it up with this quote from Jenkins Lloyd Jones as quoted by Pres. Gordon B. Hinckley:

“Anyone who imagines that bliss is normal is going to waste a lot of time running around shouting that he has been robbed.

“[The fact is] most putts don’t drop.  Most beef is tough.  Most children grow up to be just people.  Most successful marriages require a high degree of mutual toleration.  Most jobs are more often dull than otherwise. …

“Life is like an old-time rail journey—delays, sidetracks, smoke, dust, cinders and jolts, interspersed only occasionally by beautiful vistas and thrilling bursts of speed.

“The trick is to thank the Lord for letting you have the ride.”

Just a Knot in Eternity

One of the biggest obstacles we have to overcome in life is our own perspective.  It's so natural for us to see all the nickel and dime stuff as being SO big and SO important.  On the other hand, we tend to entirely miss the truly meaningful moments because we're so bogged down with minutia.  I think it has always been this way... but it has become almost laughable in its scope as of late.

We are spiritual beings that have existed for ions before this life and we will continue for an eternity after.  This earthly experience of ours is just a tiny knot in time.  The string runs for an eternity before and after the place where the knot is tied.  If we can just keep that picture in our thoughts as we go through each day, our lives will have found true perspective.

Some background:
Imagine a large family gathering.  Every single soul ever created by our Father in Heaven was in attendance.  It was a family council like no other.  We were presented with two plans.  The first was offered by one seeking to destroy the agency of man so that not one soul would be lost.  In exchange, he demanded all of God's power and glory.  The second offered to do the will of our Father, allowing all mankind to choose whom they would follow and insisting that the glory be God's forever.  A great battle for souls ensued and a third of the hosts of heaven chose to follow Lucifer (Moses 4).  Some, most likely, were lukewarm in their decision to follow Christ.  Others were valiant in their support of the One who offered to save all those who would choose to be saved.

And so we were born.  The veil of forgetfulness has erased our memory of that experience.  There are moments, however, when we are still and thoughtful that it rings truer than any other idea we've ever considered.  It IS true.  We are here for a very short time.  We are here to choose love.  We are here to choose our Savior... again.  Michael McClean once said, "If it's not love, let it go."  That's the key. 

So, we are given this one little knot of time to figure out that being right means nothing.  If being more beautiful or more powerful or more wealthy or more intelligent than those around us has become our goal, then we have missed the mark entirely.  If we spend our days just waking up, going about our normal, day-to-day routine then going to sleep just to repeat the same thing the next day, we have wasted our existence.  If we spend our spare moments lost in a virtual world and fail to strengthen our actual face-to-face relationships, we've lost. 

Each moment needs to be a mindful choice to spend it with purpose.  Each action will be a choice of how I intend to spend the rest of eternity, whether I realize it or not.  I can do the dishes and laundry begrudgingly (telestial), out of duty (terrestrial) or out of love for my family (celestial).  I can go to work and hate every moment (telestial), or I can do my best because I want to earn my paycheck (terrestrial), or I can try to lift everyone I come in contact with and make the workplace better than I found it (celestial).  When I'm in traffic I can be angry at all the idiots on the road (telestial), or I can patiently endure it as a necessary evil (terrestrial), or I can spend the time talking to my Heavenly Father or considering all these forgotten brothers and sisters of mine that surround me on the road (celestial).  Each instant brings opportunity.  Each action (or inaction) displays who we are following.

I'm not suggesting that we need to smile through all the difficult times of life and embrace them with laughter.  Heartache and suffering are necessary lessons of this life.  I'm just pointing out that if we can look at our trials with the perspective of the tiny knot, it will be easier to endure them well and to choose our response instead of allowing the situation to decide for us.  The things we suffer can often-times teach us lessons of love and light that can't be discovered any other way.

We can do this!  We will all wind our way through this small moment in eternity no matter how we choose to use it.  Eternity has already begun.

Choose love.  Let everything else go.